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PM Cancels Election Promise to Indigenous Communities

Robbie Evans in Canberra
A press release from the office of the PM has stated that Mr Abbott is disappointed to be unable to spend a week meeting with the traditional owners of his back yard, citing pressing international matters that outweigh the electoral benefits of being seen to give a toss.

“I would love to spend more time out in the [indigenous] communities, but there is nowhere for me to do my swimming leg for my triathlon training” the PM Said yesterday.

“I will be making up for this missed opportunity by booking in an extra-long stay at the Barangaroo community once it is up and running. It makes more sense for me to visit that community as they will not only have a fifty metre swimming pool, there will also be an espresso machine in the kiosk. I just hope they can hire a decent barista with all the handouts we’ve given them.”

Mr Abbott was quick to add that this isn’t a broken “core” election promise as he had no “core” intention of committing to it in the first place.

The PM prefers Barangaroo for his promised visit to a remote aboriginal community. Image: Stock.xchng

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